My Little GPS

Now, before you read this, remember one thing. I don’t write this stuff, it was sent to me by someone else. I have to say though, that this feller has a good sense of humour, and is a great poet. I am also not sure if he is married, but I understand why he would like to remain anonymous, LOL.

I have a little GPS, it sits there in my car.
A GPS is a driver’s friend, it tells you where you are.
I have a little GPS, I’ve had it all my life.
It’s better than the normal ones because it is my wife.

It gives me full instructions, especially how to drive.
“It’s sixty miles an hour”, it says, “You’re doing sixty five”.
It tells me when to stop and start, and when to use the brake
And tells me that it’s never ever, safe to overtake.

It tells me when a light is red, and when it goes to green.
It seems to know instinctively, just when to intervene.
It sees the vehicles in front, and all those to the rear.
And taking this into account, it specifies “Too near”.

I’m sure no other driver, has so helpful a device.
When we leave and lock the car, it still gives me advice.
It fills me up with counselling, each journey’s pretty fraught.
So why don’t I exchange it, and get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house, makes sure I’m properly fed.
It washes all my shirts and things, and keeps me warm in bed!
Despite all these advantages, and my tendency to scoff,
I only wish that now and then, I could turn the darn thing off!

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